Friday, June 5, 2009

Transitions.

One year ago I began 2 different blogs in another city. I had just recently moved to the Boston area from Miami, and was starting my graduate degree in Art Therapy at Lesley University. Fast forward one year later, to now, and I'm living in Los Angeles starting a new masters program in Public Art making, an MFA.

It's been a turbulent year for sure, questioning everything, feeling confused and stupid for having made mistakes. To look back now though, I am proud I made those difficult decisions, and had the courage to follow my dreams.

My motivations for going into Art Therapy was 2 fold: to become a professional, and to still be able to use art. The argument made sense to me, and I had to try it, but yet it didn't work. During the spring semester that I took off from school and worked, I considered all fields: librarian, politician, arts advocate, medical illustrator, doctor, engineer, and I'm sure there were more. I followed my partner's lead who at the time was also looking for his dream career, and decided I couldn't be a therapist.

The problem with the field for me was the idea of being a therapist. As much as I researched before, nothing prepared me for the experience, and the the outlook of doing that work for the next 20 + years. It wasn't challenging in the ways that felt fulling to me.

So thus, I went back to what I considered my idea of my "dream" job, inspired by an artist lecture (Alfredo Jaar) I attended at FIU during my undergrad studies. Jaar inspired me in the way he worked. It would only take 4 years or so for me to recognize this as a possible option for my career. Thanks to the encouragement and support of my amazing partner, I cautiously decided to give it a shot. I mean, after all, what's the worst that could happen. I decide I don't want to do this. Well, at least I know what that feels like.

I still have urges to explore other careers like a scientist, economist or urban planner, but at least I can do that as an artist. And if I get out of this program, and decide to still do those things, I can. At least I will have pursued my current dreams to the fullest.

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